


Graduations and Time Management

by Quinacridone



Series: Lessons in Being A Good Uncle (By one Perry Fletcher) [2]
Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Candace Flynn is Trans, Family Fluff, Gen, Human Perry the Platypus (Phineas and Ferb), Minor Swearing, Pre-Canon, Trans Female Character, graduations matter to perry okay, like half of those characters are just mentioned, like its like a paragraph, no betas, reaalllyy brushed over violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:48:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21711715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quinacridone/pseuds/Quinacridone
Summary: Perry usually kind of enjoys Doof's monologues.Today though? Today he found himself being uncharacteristically annoyed with Doof. He really needed this to hurry up so he could be out of here in time. He refused to not show up. Not for Candace. Not today of all days.Come hell or high water, he's going to be there to see her graduate eighth grade.
Series: Lessons in Being A Good Uncle (By one Perry Fletcher) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1564906
Comments: 19
Kudos: 280





	Graduations and Time Management

Perry glanced at the clock. 12 PM. He still had time.

This was not how this day was supposed to be going. It was June 1st, a day he’d had marked in his calendar with a big red circle for over four months. A day he had explicitly informed Major Monogram that unless it was an emergency, he was busy.

A day he’d been contacted at 830 AM, right after finishing up some non-dairy blueberry pancakes for Candace. He’d had to pass to cooking over to Linda, apologize repeatedly that it was his publisher and that’d he’d get them to leave him alone and there was no way he was missing this, and then dart upstairs and slip down through one of the pneumatic tubes to his base.

Apparently, Doofenshmirtz building anything was considered an emergency. Considering most of his inventions were minor inconveniences at best, it seemed like overkill. 

Sometimes, in his most annoyed moments, Perry had to wonder if Monogram had  _ any  _ other agents. 

So here he was, at 12 PM, hanging upside down from a trap made of bus seat fabric, listening to Doof monologue.

“-I mean, it’s so annoying! There are two seats for a reason, so two people can sit there, and you just go and take up one whole seat with your bag? How rude can you be! I mean seriously, that’s  _ got  _ to be the worst thing about public transport.-”

Perry eyed the clock again. 12:15. He still had a few hours.

He looked at Doof again. Honestly, he usually liked his nemesis’s monologues. They were kind of entertaining and in some of them, he had some pretty good points. Jaywalking was actually incredibly dangerous. Walking extremely slowly right in front of someone was annoying. Who actually liked standing in line? And honestly, the more Perry learned about Doof’s backstory, the more he had to question if the guy was just a compulsive liar or his life was actually that weird. But Doof’s inventions often went way too far or were so ridiculous that they could potentially be dangerous, and so it was kind of Perry’s job to stop him. That didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy the monologues (and occasional musical numbers).

Today though? Today he found himself being uncharacteristically annoyed with Doof. He really needed this to hurry up so he could be out of here in time. He refused to not show up. Not for Candace. Not today.

It was a big day, after all. In all reality, 8th grade graduation wasn’t all that big of a deal. But the fact that it was a graduation wasn’t the point. The fact was that it was Candace’s graduation.

As much as Perry loved his nephews (and he did, with his entire being), Candace always held a special place in his heart. She was anxious, and neurotic and tended to hyperfixate and most of the time, people kind of dismissed her as a typical girl. Perry always felt kind of angry for her, when she got overlooked for her (admittedly) genius brothers.

But Perry saw another side to her. Candace was brave, focused when she wanted to be and could do almost anything when she set her mind to it. She was unendingly protective of her brothers, even if that tended to manifest in a need to show their mother exactly what ridiculous creation they were making. She only did it for their safety.

Not only that, but this was Candace’s first graduation as Candace. Her grade six graduation had been when she was still a boy in public. Candace had been a girl at home for nearly her entire life, but her own anxiety over her gender had forced her into a rather complicated situation. She’d pretended to be a boy through kindergarten and elementary school, facing some rather vicious bullying for her long hair and love of “girly” things. But upon entering middle school, she’d informed her parents that she wanted to be a girl in public now.

Linda and Lawrence took it as well as they took her transition at home - with full support for her. Perry was honestly happy Candace had them. But he’d always felt rather connected to his ginger niece. After all, while he still tended to portray a masculine person, Perry’s sense of his own gender had always been fluid, fluctuating between feminine, masculine, in between and neither. He’d always been the odd one out when he was young, and the fact that Candace was going through something similar-

Well, Perry wouldn’t let her do that alone. He had to be there. To show her that her uncle loved her and supported her unconditionally.

“-Perry. Perry the Platypus.”

Perry snapped back into reality, realizing that Doof was staring at him. He blinked at his nemesis.

“You know, it’s rude to just ignore someone talking to you, Perry the Platypus. I thought all you good guys were supposed to have good  _ manners  _ and all that. I prepared this whole monologue about my hatred for public transport and now I feel like you heard none of it. I’d repeat it, but I kind of have to finish this up  _ quickly.  _ I have somewhere to be after this, you know. Not to rush our usual rhythm and all... So you just stay there and I’m just going to aim the Public-Transport-Be-Gone-Inator..”

With a chur of annoyance, Perry flicked a hidden knife from his sleeve and started cutting through the fabric. Luckily for him, Doof seemed to be taking a rather long time.

“-I maybe should have made the range bigger on this thing. I don’t really feel like sitting here and zapping every single bus into… wherever they go. I think it’s an alternate dimension, but I’m not really sure. Wherever it is, there are some toy buses floating around there now that aren’t my problem anymore. I had to make sure it worked properly, you know. Lets just aim this and…”

Perry fell free, quickly rolling to his feet. In an instant, he lunged at Doof, tackling him away from the machine. The man made a startled sound at suddenly having a blue haired agent pinning him.

“Perry the Platypus! How did you escape my trap? I thought you, like all people, would be way too disgusted to touch bus seat fabric.”

Perry rolled his eyes and indicated his head towards the trap, now cut down one side.

Doof made a sound of understanding. “Oohh. Did you just cut yourself free? You know, I really should’ve seen that coming and all..” 

  
Perry didn’t let him finish. He shot to his feet, lunged towards the machine and slammed the ‘Self-Destruct’ button before backing up, grabbing Doof and lunging back.

The machine exploded, as they all did. Perry dropped the man and headed for the balcony, grabbing his jetpack on the way. Doof, seeing where he was going, stumbled to his feet and started talking. 

“Hey, wait, is that all? Are you just thwarting my evil scheme and running? I mean, I know I said I had somewhere to be but- hey, wait, Perry the Platypus, I didn’t get to- Curse you Perry the Platypus! … for not letting me finish my line!”

Perry rolled his eyes when he caught the last little bit of the sentence.

When he landed, sliding into his room, he glanced at the clock. His heart sunk a little. 1:30 PM. Jeez, Doof had taken longer than he’d thought. 

Perry had an hour before he had to be at the school. It’d take him maybe 30 minutes to drive, 15 if he got lucky... Or just took his spy gear. He wondered idly if Major Monogram would mind. If it bothered him, well, serves him right, really.

Perry quickly showered, dried his hair and changed into a suit. He paused, checking to make sure he looked put together and presentable, before darting downstairs. He glanced at the nearest clock. 2 PM. He’d just barely make it.

He quickly locked the door, hopping in his car and started off.

Every minute seemed to move too fast and too slow all at once. It was like time was purposefully screwing with him. It seemed to be dragging out the time it took to do just about anything, while simultaneously moving way too fast. Every time he glanced at the clock, he felt his heart pounding a little louder.

He refused to be late, not for Candace. 

At 2:27, he pulled into the school parking lot and found a spot to park (so what if he broke a couple traffic laws on the way over, he was in a rush, damnit).

At 2:29, he was sprinting into the school, and then backtracking for a moment to lock his car.

And at 2:30, he was heading into the auditorium, scanning the seated parents for Lawrence and Linda.

Luckily, between them and the boys, they weren’t hard to find. There weren’t too many gingers in the audience and Ferb’s hair did tend to stand out. Perry slid between rows, past various neighbors he knew, trying to look as apologetic as possible, and settled down beside Lawrence, who looked at him.

“Well now, you made it! We were beginning to worry.” his cousin whispered.

Perry smiled at him weakly, signing  _ wouldn’t miss it for anything. _

It was incredibly boring. Perry had forgotten how mind numbing an endless list of names could be. He found himself just watching the teachers instead, seeing their reactions and trying to gage how they felt about each student. Or just trying to work out if that one was a vampire or not. It was entirely possible. 

But when Candace Flynn was read, Perry made sure to clap the loudest. He made sure to catch her eye, to smile at her encouragingly, to make sure she knew he was there for her. .

And when she was done, he made sure to give her the biggest hug and promise to get her the biggest non-dairy ice cream sundae they could find.

It wasn’t until he was heading to bed at around 1 in the morning after an afternoon of ice cream and celebration that something finally triggered in his memory.

There had been another girl there. With a name Perry knew all too well.

In a moment of panic, he realized in nemesis had been at the same 8th grade graduation, for one Vanessa Doofenshmirtz.

Well. Fuck.

That made everything a touch more complicated.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, after yesterday, I thought I might as well post this. I wrote it a little bit after writing the first part.  
> Candace Flynn is trans and I will die on that headcanon. Perry supports her, 300%.  
> Perry is also somewhat genderfluid, although he prefers male pronouns.  
> I have so many more ideas for this universe, y'all have no idea. Special thanks to my fantastic friends over at the Rangers Apprentice One Riot server, for dealing with me rambling about this nonstop and also reading my work pre-posting it. They're the real MVPs here.


End file.
